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Hey, man! You're ruining my concert!

Posted: Thursday, July 31, 2008 6:00 AM by Anna Chan
Filed Under:

Since attending my first concert at age 12 (it was Nelson, if you must know), I’ve been hooked on live music. Sure, CDs sound flawless and uninterrupted at home, but a concert can provide a glimpse of the person behind the tunes, reinterpretations of favorite songs, and the opportunity to enjoy it in with a room (or stadium) full of others who also dig the artist.

 

But there are always a few folks who put a damper on the shows and my mood:

 

The Backpacker

What could anyone possibly need at a rock show that would require a backpack to hold? And if getting whacked by that pack every time said backpacker moves an inch in the pit isn’t bad enough, try getting slammed into it and having mysterious jagged items shoved into your chest as the rush of people surges toward the stage.

 

The Singer

Say you’re at a park, checking out a mellow artist and gently rocking to the music. Then suddenly, the vocalist goes off-key and the timing is all wrong. Oh wait, no, that’s not the vocalist, it’s the person sitting next to you. Shut it, buddy!  I didn’t pay good money to hear your karaoke stylings, OK?

 

The Kid Toters

Even worse than The Singers are the people who let their little kids scream and run wild while you’re trying to chill to the tunes. Sure, families should encourage their children to explore and enjoy music – but when the kids are old enough to know better than to test their vocals against the band’s! If you can’t get your little ones to behave, get a babysitter or stay home.

 

The Statue

Music often leads to dancing, and that’s certainly true at concerts. Yet some people knowingly purchase general admission tickets to popular shows, stand in the middle of the floor, arms crossed, feet firmly planted, then throw nasty looks at any concertgoer who dares to dance and accidentally brushes against them. Want to avoid contact? Buy a reserved-seating ticket, genius.

 

The Stinker

This person ranks pretty high on my list of concert annoyances. Seriously, there’s really nothing worse than being shoved up against a giant, shirtless, sweaty, incredibly smelly guy. Well, maybe getting shoved around by the crowd and slipping from one sweaty, stinky, shirtless guy to the next, with no way to escape the deepest bowels of the mosh pit as you become drenched in other people’s sweat and BO. C’mon, guys. Keep your shirt on and use some deodorant.

 

Share your own concertgoing peeves in the comments.

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Comments

My biggest peeve at the concert is a little different.  I attend most concerts with my sister who is in a wheelchair.  There is nothing worse (to me) then paying for the handicap seats and then the people in front of us stand right in my sisters way all concert so that she can't see.  We're normally charged at the highest ticket price for these tickets and she spends most of the concert not seeing the artist, and I'm the "rude" person who keeps asking people to move just a little bit so that she can see.

Sarah, Moline, IL (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 9:12 AM)

The Singers are the worst, but I'd also add the smashers - the people who dance around in their own little world, never caring that they are sloshing drinks and leaving bruises on everyone in their immediate vicinity.

A variation of the Smashers would be the Humpers -- the folks who are so into their date or concert hookup that they are all but having sex on the concert floor -- I want to enjoy the music without being part of an involuntary threesome!

Stephanie, Washington DC (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:00 AM)

A friend of mine took his parents to see Bob Seeger in concert a year or so ago.  He told me the couple sitting next to his father were heavily making out and needed to get a room.  It made everyone a bit uncomfortable.  hehe

Rinso365 (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:00 AM)

I've got an idea.  Stay out of the mosh pit if you dont like stinky, sweaty, people.  And the statue paid good money like you did.  He/she is just enjoying the concert in a different fashion.  Maybe you are the problem?

Boomer, Imperial Beach, CA (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:01 AM)

I'd add "the Talker"  the person that chats with their friend the whole concert (why are they even there if they don't want to listen to the music) and "The Woo-hooer" the person that has to scream out at the most inopportune moment: My least favorite was at a Tracy Chapman concert when she was singing "Behind the Wall" a cappella and some jerk screamed out in the middle this chilling song about spouse abuse - it wasn't a woo-hoo moment.

Andrew Roth, Centennial, CO (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:13 AM)

Dont forget all the drunk guys falling over

George (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:14 AM)

My pet peeve is "The Tall Guy." I'm a fully grown height of four-foot-ten. Without fail, at every concert I attend, the tallest person there will stand in front of me. If I dare to tap on his shoulder and ask if I can stand in front of him, more often than not, I get scowled at. How dare I be so small! But, once in a blue moon, someone will graciously step aside... Hey - I paid just as much money as the next person to see the show!

QB, Washington DC (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:15 AM)

I have this habit of attracting talkers in concerts and movie theatres.  I saw Tina Turner a few years back, and Joe Cocker was the opening act.  I happen to love Joe Cocker, so I was having fun until the guy next to me kept whining, "When's Tina coming out?  When are we gonna see Tina?"  And he was addressing the questions to me personally, so it was getting harder to ignore.  Luckily there were a precious few empty seats nearby, so I managed to escape after a few minutes.

Natalie, Edmonton, AB (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:21 AM)

The Loud Talker
You go to an intimate performance and some people are so caught up in the social opportunity, they yak it up while the artist is playing and clap at the end of the song as if they actually heard it! Amazing!

Pablo (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:21 AM)

While I strongly agree with your pet peeves (especially the off key singer), one of my others are the bands themselves.

I go to concerts to hear the music I love (from the radio, cd, etc.), not 10 minutes of musical masturbation while the lead guitar player, bassist, etc., all show their licks.

This is especially true with long-time established bands with huge catalogs. Please, let me hear a few more of your songs that I love instead of an additional 10 or 15 minutes of musical solos

Sheila, San Antonio, TX (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:21 AM)

I know a lot of people don't dig opening acts, so I might be alone on this one.  I wish people would just step out into the lobby or whatever if they're not enjoying it.  Some of my favourite bands are pretty obscure in my neck of the woods, so when a band I love from Denmark showed up as the opening act for The Strokes, I was thrilled.  As great a set as they played, I got treated to a bunch of people playing hacky sack in front of me and chatting on their cell phones because they were bored before the "real band" came on.  The kicker was that it was an outdoor venue, so these morons could have gone anywhere while they were playing.

Allie, Vancouver, BC (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:28 AM)

My biggest pet peeve is when you attend a big-name concert, have nose-bleed seats, and the people who are in the last to very last row behind you keep yelling "Down in front."  Seriously, your view is as poor as mine... watch the Jumbotron, get up and dance yourself, and put a cork in it!

Pam, Elmira NY (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:31 AM)

I just have to share that "Nelson" was also MY first concert, at the Duquoin, IL State Fair, circa 1989.  I still have the cassette tape.  That was some lovely, long blond hair those twins had....

Heather, San Antonio, TX (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:31 AM)

My peeves are people who talk and laugh thru the concert (why did they come?), and those who buy a seat and proceed to stand through the whole concert! I've paid $125+ for a seat in the first 10 rows, only to have to stand for 2 hours because the people in front decide to stand. I didn't pay that money for a seat, to not be able to sit in it!! You're in front, you don't need to stand!!

Maria, Pennsylvania (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:33 AM)

The TALKERS!!
Why??
Why would you pay for a ticket to come and stand in front of the artist and RuN YOUR MOUTH. I can't tell you how many times I've suggested people shut up or leave. I remind them I didn't pay to here them wank!

Misty Baltimore, MD (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:35 AM)

I don't like it when I'm trying to enjoy a song and someone is talking on his/her cell phone...just chatting, not an emergency.

Mary, Portland, Oregon (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:36 AM)

I'm not a general admission type, but often pay high prices for good seats at venues with all reserved seating. While I understand the crowd wanting to stand for a favorite song or the finale (the performers often encourage it and I do it too) I am tired of the folks who think it's OK to keep standing for the entire concert.

Roberta, Chicago (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:37 AM)

Good list.  Others to mention:
--the beer spiller, who pours their drink all over me because they can't hold it and dance at the same time.
--the conversationalists, who spend the entire concert yelling a conversation to each other.  Right in my ear.
--the drunk who spends the whole time running into me and apologizing.  It's one thing to slip a bit now and then, but to shove me every two minutes or so for an entire show gets real old, real quick.

chuck, charleston, sc (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:38 AM)

My biggest pet peeve are the people that get totally smashed before the concert and the proceed to stagger around and constantly yell at the band during the show... they pay all that money to see someone and then they won't even remember it the next day

Sue H. Evansville, IN (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:39 AM)

I went to a Dave Matthews Band concert in Salt Lake City a couple years back, and when Dave came on stage, the audience whipped out their fattys and lit up.  I abhor smoking and especially illegal drug use, so these potheads put a big damper on my concert.  I guess I should have known what I got myself into by going there in the first place...

Eric, Salt Lake City, UT (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:40 AM)

I agree absolutely with the comment about the Talkers!!  The absolute worst!!  As for the Standers, it is MY pet peeve when people tell you to sit down.  Hello!!  You are at a rock concert, if you want to sit with an unobstructed view, buy tickets in the front row!

I was asked to sit down at a Duran Duran concert when we were in the second-to-last row.  Yup, someone in the LAST ROW had the gall to ask us to sit down, not to mention everyone else in the entire place was up dancing!

Thomas, Cincinnati, Ohio (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:45 AM)

Ive been to thousands of live music events over more than 30 years.

It really sounds like you just want to gripe about everything. Everybody pays for their ticket and so everybody gets to enjoy the show how they best enjoy it.  People get sweaty in mosh pits and some folks are fat so if it bothers you, change your location. I think its a beautiful thing that people bring their kids to shows. I wish they would use earplugs or headsets to protect their kids' hearing but that too is their business.
If its so stressful and annoying, why do you go?
we are all one. the annoyance you feel towards your fellow concert goer is a mirror of what you are. lighten up, dance, sing and enjoy the show!

MntRosie, northern NM (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:46 AM)

The throwers.  Some idiots always feeling they have to throw things at the people in front of them.  Attended an Ozzy concert in Alpine Valley (East Troy, WI) in the early 90's.  Wonderful outdoor amphitheather on a great summer night.  Wife and I were having a great time until some idiots decided to start tearing up sod and throwing it at people sitting closer to the stage.  Why do some jerks always try to ruin it for others?

Kirk, LV, NV (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:46 AM)

Several years ago, I went to see Peter, Paul & Mary at Chastain Park in Atlanta.  The night of the concert, the people behind me were blabbing away during a good deal of the program, so I finally turned to them and told them, "Look, I can hear the performers fine, but I can hear you better!"  They got the point; that they were ruining the concert for me.  As a way to make amends, they gave me one of their backstage passes so I was able to meet the performers in person.

Michael, Atlanta, GA (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:46 AM)

What I love are small venues that have NO SEATS....ANYWHERE !!!! Theres nothing like standing up say 45 minutes....providing the opening act hits the stage on time..endure their 30 to 45 minute set..then standing another 45 plus minutes waiting for the headliner...again providing they get to the stage on time...and standing thru their hour long plus set....so its a little aggervating to pay $35.00 for a show then be required to stand up in a crowded,shoving cramped area for 5 or more hours !!!!....NICE !!!!

Spyder...The Attic (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:46 AM)

I went to a concert this past weekend and was asked by the 75 year old couple seated behind us to sit down (rather than stand and dance in front of the seats we had paid for).  At first we obliged, moving to the aisles but finally decided that our seats were our seats and we were there to enjoy ourselves.  I politely offered to the couple to move to the 4 empty seats in front of us so that we wouldn't be blocking their view while we enjoyed the show but they refused and continued to grumble throughout the show.

Laura Long Island NY (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:48 AM)

The drunk guy, the grinder, the slutty girls who push their way to the front even if they got their late!

CH, Portland, OR (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:51 AM)

I don't care for the drug users..the smell is horrible and I got really sick at a rolling stones concert the opening band came on and then the rolling stones and I had to leave because the guy behind me was doing opium....I heard almost 2 songs and that was it...I became sick to my stomach and thank god my daughter was with me because I couldn't find my way out of the place.  She drove home...next time I will call security...

Jskiing, lebanon, nj (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 10:59 AM)

I go to a lot of venues to see live bands around Central PA and the ones that make me crazy are the girls with the luggage sized purses who will sit at the very front of the stage, literally ON the edge of the stage, taking up a good 10-12 feet of real estate so they can sit there and smoke/drink/yap while the band is playing. Because yeah, the other 100+ of us didn't want to actually be able to see the band or stand anywhere near the stage. They usually get some weird looks from the band as well. Seriously, go sit on the couch.

W, Harrisburg PA (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:00 AM)

I think you are all just a bunch of complainers. Some people look for something to b**** about. If it is general seating and someone is annoying you MOVE!! If you pay alot of money for tickets in row 9 and people stand in front of you, you should expect it. I don't think artists who are putting their all into the concert want to look out at a bunch of fans in their seats.

KIM Aurora Indiana (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:01 AM)

As a 6'1" female, don't be placing all the blame the tall people for their height, and the seats they pay for.  Which just happen to be in front of yours.  In most other settings, my height doesn't do me any good, but when I pay general admission, and everyone else is standing up through the whole concert, you can bet that I will be too.    

Sara, Sacramento, CA (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:03 AM)

This is great... but seriously  ALL OF THE ABOVE is part of the live concert experience :) Make the best of it!

S Chrzan, Ft Lauderdale, FL (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:06 AM)

Poor Eric... he went to a rock concert and discovered that people there smoked pot! I'm shocked, I tell you -- shocked!
Dude, stay home and keep inside your bubble. And stop listening to Dave Matthews! You don't have permission.

Bob D., Yorktown, N.Y. (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:06 AM)

I just plain don't bother with concerts anymore.  I got so sick of rude behaviour, sick of security guards that were completely useless, sick of bathroom floors filled with broken beer bottles, and sick of the fact that everyone thinks that the fact that they paid admission gives them carte blanche to act like absolute...well, the only printable word I can think of right now is "jerks".  As much as I love music, no band is worth all that crap to me.  I save my money and buy their tunes instead.

Samantha, New York, NY (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:07 AM)

People who insist on standing the whole concert, the drunken singers,spillers and yellers, cell phone talkers/texters/picture takers.  People.. just shut up, put the phones away, sit down, and enjoy the show.

William Becker, Tallahassee Florida (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:07 AM)

What about "the blackberry user/shower/talker?"  I recently saw Death Cab for Cutie and the three business dudes were on their blackberries all night and then would talk about what they were texting.  Obnoxious!

Chi-girl, Chicago, IL (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:09 AM)

I hate people that only stand for the encore. Is the one song the only one worth dancing for? All the other songs sucked or is just sitting and tapping your toes the best way to show you're moved by the music?

Jimmy, Portland, OR (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:09 AM)

Gotta agree with Eric in Salt Lake...for me nothing ruins it like choking on the pot smoke of the guy next to me for the entire set.  
Oh and don't forget the Bathroom Puker.  The person that came to the concert totally sloshed, made it through three songs, and then chucked all over the bathroom floor because they didn't make it to a toilet.

Leslie, Albuquerque (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:10 AM)

I have to respond to Eric, Salt Lake City, UT:
You went to Dave Matthews and were surprised that everyone was smoking pot?  You are a moron sir.  It is like saying I went to see Jimmy Buffett and everyone was drinking, or at the Kiss concert everyone had their faces painted.  When you buy a ticket for a specific band, you know what kind of scene that you will encounter when you get there.  If you do not like the smoke, stay away from the fire!

Geoff, LA,CA (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:11 AM)

Seriously?  People go to a concert and expect people to sit through most of it?  Try having fun while you're there - dance, enjoy yourself.  The reason you buy a seat (regardless of whether or not you sit in it) is because that's how you get into the concert.  If I were the performer and my audience sat the majority of the time, I'd think I was doing something wrong.  Maybe the "rules" are different if you're going to see Michael Bolton or something equally un-energetic, though.

Kaye, Houston, TX (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:12 AM)

Last night I saw Poison, Sabeastion Bach and Dokken at the Jones Beach Outdoor Theatre in wantagh, NY.  Yes, I'm an 80s throwback.  I make no apologies, there are plenty of us.  But...  a relatively drunk woman kept falling on my husband as she 'danced' throughout the show.  This was only topped by her equally as drunk husband urinating at his seat and having it splash on us.  I think this may have cured my need to see 80s hair bands.

Kim Behrle Westhampton, NY (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:13 AM)

The Creepy Middle Aged Man~who is not at the venue to see the show but to look at younger women.  Then proceeds to hit on the girls.  EW!!!!  Please...you're as old my dad.

Meghan, Tulsa, OK (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:14 AM)

I am a person who brings a "sac" to a show. It holds my camera, smokes, phone, and anything I may buy. I do try and be careful not to knock into others, but in the same hand, prefer to have the added cushion when 50 people around me are slamming in to everything and everyone.  I am also a singer.  For the most part, most shows I go to are loud enough to where it shouldn't matter.  I'm there to enjoy it...and I enjoy singing along.  

Bringing children to concerts is a good learning experience, and have brought mine to many.  They need to know what the proper etiquette is.  This should be taught/learned for anywhere (restaurants, movies, sporting events).  If my child is disruptive, I address the situation and make whatever adjustments needed.

As far as the opinion of The Statue, to each his own, not everyone wants to have the same experience.  I have stood my ground hard at many concerts, often throwing nasty looks and or comments their way when the obnoxious teeny-bopper next to or behind me continuously bumps, grabs, or slams into me.  On the occasion where I choose to join in the jumping and thrashing around, I do try and maintain myself for the sake of others, so I expect the same in return. Sometimes and honest apology is good enough to look past the behavior.

About the only thing that I will agree with is The Stinker.  I don’t know how in the world it happens, but at almost every concert I go to, everyone from my city who doesn’t believe in wearing deodorant decides to go too.  I have just taken this as a staple for a good show…stinky people.

I try (an honest attempt) to respect my fellow concert goers.  If I have a problem, I try to address it nicely.  If that does not work, I follow the “who was here first” rule, where if they were there, I move, if I was there, I ask them to move…and if it’s reserved seating, I’ll ask for assistance, or see if I can move to another seat.  We all pay the same amount (for the most part) to get in and enjoy it however we feel, and sometimes have to adjust ourselves (and attitudes) in order to do so.

Amy, Richmond VA (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:15 AM)

I agree with all of what was said, but how about the drunks who sit in back of you and have yell "All right!" into you ears someone is taking a solo. or banging the back of your seat with their feet because they're "in" to the music?
I just don't get it, is there a problem with sitting in your seat so you can actually listen and watch the show?

Steve Gurnis, Sussex, New Jersey (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:15 AM)

I really get frustrated with the people who are throwing elbows in the mosh pit. I went to Warped Tour in Boston and I certainly expect a mosh pit or 2 or 50, but throwing elbows is dangerous and just plain mean. I'm here to have fun, not get put in the hospital.

Zack, Boston, Mass. (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:15 AM)

Hate the drunken 40 and 50-something women at the Steely Dan concerts I have been too who are shoved into clothing 2 sizes too small, drunk, dancing, singing and think they are the Rikki of song fame...UGH

Carlyd (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:19 AM)

I know I'll be "whipping out" my big fatty this weekend when we go see Kid Rock in Boyne City, Michigan.  That along with an $8.00 beer will make the concert so enjoyable.  Rock on!!!

susieQ, Bay City, Mich. (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:20 AM)

For most of these same reasons, I have pretty much given up on concerts, though I am a musician myself and love live music. The ticket prices keep going up and the experience just keeps getting worse. Especially do I disagree with the attitude, "Hey I paid the same price as you for my ticket, so if I want to act in a way that totally screws the experience for you, that's my right." Except I paid for the ticket to see and hear the show, not listen to you talk football with your buddy at the top of your lungs for two hours.

Tom, Fort Lauderdale, Florida (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:21 AM)

The real problem is that people are not used to being together to enjoy something anymore.  They're all at home in front of their televisions and computers.  Everyone is completely oversaturated with entertainment and can't focus long enough to enjoy a live event.  Therefore, the talking, cell phones, etc.  It's the same in movie theaters.  We've lost it when it comes to basic civility.  That's what made concerts fun, not self-centered idiots who yap through a whole performance.

Tim NYC (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:21 AM)

My biggest pet peeve is the guy who yells "Freebird" or "Stairway to Heaven" at EVERY show.

Steve South Portland, ME (Sent Thursday, July 31, 2008 11:22 AM)



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