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Affection for 'Big Love' only grows larger

Posted: Wednesday, February 11, 2009 6:00 AM by Paige Newman
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Note: If you haven't been watching the current season, there are spoilers below.

“Big Love” is one of those series that grew on me slowly, but that now has me fully in its grasp. While its first season was devoted to explaining the premise of a man who was raised in a polygamist sect and who’s married to three women, and the second season was about the complications that came with those choices, this season feels fully about characters rather than concepts. And it’s become positively Shakespearian in terms of its drama and the connections the characters have to one another.


HBO
Chloë Sevigny, Jeanne Tripplehorn and Ginnifer Goodwin are the three sister wives of "Big Love."

The character who really stands out this season is Nicki Grant (Chloë Sevigny). From the outside it would appear that Bill’s (Bill Paxton) second wife has the least chemistry with him, but this season what viewers realize is how much this pair has in common. Of the three wives, Nicki is the only one who truly understands the way Bill was raised, as they both grew up on Juniper Creek compound, and the only wife that truly knows what it means to live The Principle as Bill does.

There was a moment in this season’s third episode (“Prom Queen”) where we find out that Nicki has been married more than once. Her father, the prophet Roman Grant (Harry Dean Stanton), had put her picture in “The Joy Book” (used to shop the girls to prospective husbands) and she’d been married off as a teen against her will. And, when she's confronted with this secret from her past, her mixture of shame and defensiveness feels so utterly true to life that it's almost painful for viewers.

Later in the episode we see her rip her picture out of the Joy Book and weep on the shoulder of her boss (a lawyer who is trying to prosecute her father and doesn’t realize who she really is). Every negative feeling that you may have had about this character, whom Sevigny wisely never tries to make her likeable, just evaporates.

In that moment, you really know why she’s with Bill, that like him, she needed to escape her life, but did so in a way that allowed her to hang on to her belief system.

And yet both characters, especially this season, struggle to live within the rules they were raised under. In episode four ("On Trial"), after the charges are dropped against Roman and he tells Nicki that he owes his freedom to her, she responds by quietly pushing him down the courthouse stairs. The gesture is almost childish, not quite satisfying (after all, her father did go free), and completely Nicki.

All I want to know is what she'll do next. Now that’s the sign of a great TV show.

Do you watch "Big Love"? Tell me what you like or don't like about the show.

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Love the show.  I don't like the fourth wife they are introducing.  They have enough going on with the three Bill already has.
I was not sure if Roman knew it was her but then, after I laughed, he looked at her and you could tell he knew she was stronger than he thought.  She is going to get what she wants no matter what.  As for Bill and this other "wife" I think it is pretty stupid now that Barb is cancer free.  I don't think that she will fit in.  Margene just wants a friend.
Last week I proclaimed to my friends that Nicky was my favorite character on the show.  This week I was so mad at Nicky at the end of the show I wanted to somehow yell at them of her betrayal to Bill and the other wives.  All the characters in this show have so many layers.  You can love them and loathe them at the same time.  
I also love this show.  I watch to understand why a woman would choose to be in this type of family, and agree to take on a fourth wife.  The interaction between the wives is amazing.  Of course, Bill gets pulled in 100 directions.  Chloe's acting is amazing and worthy of an Emmy.
I also have big love for this show. It humanizes something so far out of our society by connecting us with this incredible family and the wacky world around them. This year seems to be moving faster than ever and I'm always sad when it's over yet anxious to find out what'll happen next. And let me say, "What a cast!"
I thought Barb's character in the beginning of this season was just goofy, but they have dropped that, thank god.  Nicki's character has always been the most layered.  But I do love Marge the most.  Such a fun person.
Great show! Don't forget Sarah, who wants nothing to do with polygamy for herself or her unborn child. I really think "Desperate Housewives" and "Big Love" should switch names.
I have been a faithful follower of Big Love since the begining! So many layers to each of the characters showing just how complicated this type of life can be. A very dramatic life. I agree with others, new wife not such a good idea.
I have loved this show from day 1!!!!  I think the fourth wife could certainly be a mistake, I understand why Barb wanted her with the cancer scare, but now she is going to be fine, and hopefully she won't agree to marry them.  Sarah, poor Sarah, when will they realize that there is something wrong with her?  And where is Teeny?  I don't think we've seen her since the first episode.  The bantering back and forth between the 3 wives is great!  Nicki saying Margene broke Bill, that's why she can't get pregnant...just love it!  Hopefully HBO won't drop this show too, just like all the other wonderful shows they have developed.  Carnivale' and Deadwood ended way to soon and never finished...there are still unanswered questions.  Big Love could go on for years, with their children - do they enter polygamy? I'd love to see it play out for a very long time.
I was really wishing he had a little more damage from the falling down the stairs.  I hate his character's egotism.  I also like the prospect of the 4th wife and the grandmother's responses.  it was hilarious (Quorum!).  I find myself thinking their situation is kinda neat, with the sister-wives.  but I know it is fiction.  I was also hoping that the lawyer would figure out who Nikki was.  I am hoping maybe later he sees a photo or something.  This could come back to haunt Roman because of obvious tampering.
I absolutely adore this show.  My husband and I watch it together and I joke about how lucky he is to only have 1 wife, after watching this show, he agrees :)  It is the most underappreciated show on tv.  No mention of it at any award shows and the writing and the acting are superb!  I wish they would get the attention and respect they deserve!
The cast is great, but I believe it's the writing that is special. Every character has deep ironies in both actions and words, which is what makes them so very real. As a focus, the humanity is forefront; the bigamy is falling away. They all lie to each other, but more importantly, they lie to themselves. It's what we do, yet most writers don't translate that as well as this group.
I LOVE the show!! and agree with "Lovin It" - please don't drop it like they did with Carnivale and Deadwood -
I love the show.  Some of the concepts of the characters are down-right silly at times for me.  But, I guess that's why I love it.  I am fascinated with oldest daughter, she is very beautiful but she's sad and conflicted. I can't wait until her parents discover that she is "with child"...
I love this show! Nicky is so warped, I love it! She makes me so mad with all of her backhandedness but she really can't help it given her upbringing and you can't help but be a hangeron to find out what she will do next. I have never thought that my favorite character would be one that I loathed so much but without her and all the baggage that her family brings, there would be nothing to watch.  Albie, Wanda, and Lois are three of the best supporting characters in all of TV land.  I can't wait for the moment that Albie gets caught in a compromising position for real and is exposed for who he really is. I'm pretty sure much of his family already know's but for someone who his taking over the family business of Divine Prophecy, it will be devistating (for the characters) and hilarious (to me) at the same time.  I just hope that we don't have to wait a couple of years to go by for the next season to start after this one is over. I was really thinking that they weren't going to bring it back as the time passed and held on to HBO solely for the hope that Big Love would return to the airwaves. Yaay, Big Love!
I love this show I find it very interesting and insightful.  I could never live my life this way but I think my favorite wife is Barb and Margene, Niki is so secerative and deceitful just like her mother who is a fourth wife to Roman.  Because I thought surely she was first wife and I love that Alby is gay and trying to be the prohet.  This show has somethng for everyone.  
I was a fan from the moment go, After the sopranos, HBO had to make "Big Love" thier priorty! The best show on television, period!
I live in Utah and had many family members shocked (yes they are Mormon) at the fact that I love the show. I have loved it since day one. However, after I explained that it doesn't depict any religion but their own, they were more open to it and watch it now just as I do. I love it! I can't get enough. It is such an exact story line of what happens in and around this area is interesting to watch. The best part is my husband watches with me and says he could never live that way. It makes me feel good! :)
I also have watched this show from day one. I think this is a realistic show and the acting is incredible. I do want to agree with others that a 4th wife would be to much right now on the show. There is already so much going on. Maybe next season would be best to introduce another wife. Me nor my husband have ever really been into series programs. But this one was different. We love this show and can't wait till Sunday to see what happens next.
I feel so deeply sorry for these characters -- except for Boss Lady--Margene, Nickie & Bill are abuse victims. they are still living out and within the world of their abusive/abused, psychotic parents. Wow. wow... fascinating, heartbreaking story -- lovely & awful and great.
This is such a GREAT show!  I love all the characters (even the ones you have to hate) and there is always something new and insane happening to them.  I really don't like the introduction of the fourth wife, she doesn't seem to fit in and I think if they end up getting married she will get sick of that life quickly and leave them.  I think something needs to be done about Wanda she is insane and I am getting tired of her character, she does add something different but I get sick of her whining, mental episodes, and antics at trying to get attention.  Speaking of attention seeking I hope Rhonda is gone for good, she is a basket case.
Wait--Sarah is pregnant? I saw the first episode, but have the missed the others? Can someone fill in please?
I agree with everyone else...You can't help but love Nicki...She's trying so hard to fit in, but her "training" at Juniper Creek keeps holding her back...I love how everyone is a "Sex Addict" - I think she's said it at least once an episode so far this season :o)  There's still a lot more going on with her - the whole birth control issue and not wanting to have any more kids right now...

While I am intrigued by the whole 4th wife idea, there is already so much going on with everyone that I think it would be just a little too much...But, it's a great show, and I love watching it every week!

And to think that the producers have so much great court-related footage to work with this year, with all of the mess here in Texas...It was a gold mine for them :o)
This show is sheer brilliance. They have taken a conceptual lifestyle that stirs large controversy and demonstrated it in a way that evokes sympathy from its viewers. Not that I believe polygamy is an appropriate lifestyle, but I do seem to have a better understanding of it based on the characters of this show.
Big Love is my all time favorite show - how they manage to make this plausible is beyond me - but I do love it!
Season on ehad me hooked from the get-go.  I thought that the characters were becoming a bit one-dimensional during season two and I am glad they got things rolling off the bat in the third season.  Nicki is also my favorite character.  There are times when you just hate her and then she does something that completely redeems her character,... like jumping on the sword in the season three opener during the neighborhood block party.  Absolutely first rate acting and writing...
Love, Love, Love, this show. Hubby and I watch every episode. Love the fact that Tom Hanks is a producer. The characters are great and the writing is brilliant. Sure hope it is not off the air for 2 years again in between seasons. I also am not loving the 4th wife idea. Can't wait to see what happens with Sarah and the baby...
Big Love is one of the best shows HBO has had on.
I, too watch for the great characters and storylines.I could not live this lifestyle but can sympathize with these women for choosing Bill. All are good mothers, good wives and good sisters.
I'm not sure about the fourth wife, though.
I love this show! It's fantastic. It cements the final repair to the damage done to this country by the 60s.Putting women back in their true and rightful place as nothing but chattel....playthings in a never ending soap opera revolving around powerful men.The fact that US women have been so drawn in by this further solidifies my belief that the entire women's movement was nothing but a waste of time.As a top tier alpha male---I feel my lifetime supporting womens causes was a joke.Seeing their age-old suppression as more akin to slavery than any other social mode? I guess I was wrong.
    Thank God I married a strong woman.I won't be bringing up the idea of 'sister wives' up with her anytime soon.
    Good cast.Great story lines.All designed to lower the resistance to the ideas that need to be seeded to take our daughters back to the 1860s.

Not MY daughter.
Love, love, love this show! It is a wonderful exploration of the impact of a cult like Juniper Creek on its inhabitants and, IMHO, a great character study of people living a life they know might not exactly be as wonderful as they think, but they can't admit it to themselves. Kamerin in Utah - it is interesting to me how the LDS church initially protested this show, but have kept quiet since it premiered. I think anyone watching it would agree this is not a life that most people could or would want to live.

And Paige Newman is totally right that this season is, at least so far, the best. The show managed to include a bit of real life (a raid on a different compound a la last summer's raid on the Texas FLDS ranch) and really grow the characters. Nikki has long been my favorite, even though she's completely underhanded and not trustworthy. Her humanity has been showing itself quite visibly this year, and I really think she might have a thing for the DA; it would be an interesting dilemna for someone so dedicated to The Principle to fall in love with another man. I also love how Chloe Sevigny manages to be sexy and alluring even wrapped up in the compound uniform.

The other fantastic character this season is Lois Henrickson, played to the hilt by Grace Zabriskie. Her attempted murder of Frank was so graphic I couldn't watch, but it was her scene on the phone with Bill, talking about her daughter Maggie who apparently committed suicide after being married against her will, that really stunned me. The pain being dredged up by the conversation, which Lois could barely participate in, was etched across her face. Brilliant acting on her part.
Bill- From Washington!  Love your response. You hit the nail on the head about Utah/mormons and the show. Great comment!
I seriously doubt that this will be allowed to be viewed by others but in this case silence is equal to endorsement. I am appalled that your show and  HBO  could gloss-up this lifestyle.What has obviously been swept under the carpet, for profit, by your writers is that NO Matter How much you try to make it look as if these women are capable of making free will decisions,the sad fact is that they are ingrained to believe they are not worthy human beings. All they have ever been told is that women are not even valued enough to enter Heaven without being "married". When you are taught that your inability to decide about who you want to be married to or how many other woman will be included in the MARRIAGE is for your own good and this will be how your soul will be Judged. How good a wife they are is determined by their willingness to comply and be sweet...Does that sound familiar ? Do you have any idea what it is like to live in this kind of fear. Can you imagine how this may INFLUENCE the ability to make a "CHOICE. To insinuate that this is anything but abuse that is condoned by our " law enforcement winks" makes your glamorization of this horrible abuse (mental and physical ) worse than those who turn up the television when they hear the screaming for mercy next door. Your shows favorable depiction of this is equivalent to putting  "makeup" on the bruises. Let me guess.. is the next BIG show about how the catholic children really liked how they were treated by the abusive priests?  Or better yet THEY HAD AN EQUAL SAY IN THE MATTER.  
Ihope someday you comeface to face with one of these women who been able to escape and can tell you the truth about the Polygimist sects... And then I pray you can forgive yourselves.
I have to admit that I love this show.  As a Utah Mormon (gasp) I'm probably supposed to protest in indignation, but my husband and I have been hooked from the get go.  I think they do an adequate job distinguishing the compound religion from the LDS church, and as much as I hate to admit it, the nosy, overbearing Mormon neighbors have more than a grain of truth to them.  It has nothing to do with the Church, as the members in other states I've lived in were nothing like this, it's just the crazy culture that is Utah.  I can't STAND Nicki, but it's kind of fun to see her image of her father start to crack, and this palpable "thing" between her and the DA should prove interesting as well.  I'm not really sold on Ana, and can't WAIT to see what happens with Sarah.
Why is this show always getting snubbed by The Emmys'? This is the best drama on tv today.
Most of the time I watch Big Love with my mouth hanging open - in shock! I am always amazed at the details of these people's lives. I love this show!
Fantastic show.  Have watched every episode of the past two seasons to the point I can quote them!  Although The Sopranos is my favorite series of all time, Big Love is a very close second.  To see people in circumstances so outrageous, so different from your own life (yes, I'm a Jersey Girl, but have nothing in common with Tony!), yet to see that they deal with the same issues we deal with -- with family, work, neighbors, husband/wife emotions, twisted relatives, money, you name it -- it's incredible how you can relate to them on some level.  

Can't wait for Sunday evenings to see where this season will take us!!


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