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Best of the misheard lyrics

Posted: Thursday, April 09, 2009 6:00 AM by Gael Fashingbauer Cooper
Filed Under:

See, this is why I love the misheard lyrics topic, and never really get tired of it. Because for every "there's a bathroom on the right," a.k.a. a lyric that's been banging around this topic for decades now, there's a "I fight with Loralee, Loralee always wins."

The "Loralee" lyric is how reader Allie's sister misheard "I fight authority, authority always wins" in John Mellencamp's "Authority Song." and I tell you, I am never going to hear that song again without singing the new version. Loralee must be one tough cookie.


AP file
KISS wants to rock and roll all night, and probably every day.

Since we're pushing 500 comments on the original post as I write this, it's hard to sort through and find the gems. Here are my favorites so far.

"Mine was for the Beatles' "Paperback Writer."  For the longest time (seriously, until I was in college), I thought the lyric was "Take a back right turn" instead of "Paperback Writer." --Jen

"One I still get teased about by my brother:  "Help me Rhonda, help me get a ride on my horse."  Hey, I was only 8 or 9 at the time!"    --Andy

"One of my co-workers legitimately thought that the chorus to Van Halen's 'Panama' was 'Had enough! Had enou-ugh!'  He started singing it at the end of a work day and we all giggled heartily."   --Jim

"A friend thought the lyrics in Sister Golden Hair were 'I could not make it Sunday 'cause I got some dandy grass'  rather than ".. cause I got so damn depressed." We were in college so it made sense."    --Rex

"I've heard many people mix up REM's Orange Crush line "I've got my spine, I've got my orange crush" with 'I've got my Sprite, I've got my Orange Crush' as if the band were enjoying some soft drinks."    --Paul

Back to Kenny Rogers and "Lucille." I still think he sings -- 'Four hundred children and this crap that won't heal.' " --Wes

"Every girl's crazy about a shark that's tan."  --David

"My 3-year-old at the time sang 'I can see all popsicles in my way' instead of "I can see all obstacles in my way" in the song "I Can See Clearly Now the Rain is Gone"."  --Mel

"I heard 'Hollaback Girl' by Gwen Stefani as 'there ain't no Hall of Fat Girls.'" --Gavin ("I ain't no Harlem black girl" was also heard by a few of you.)

"(My ex) thought that it was 'I've got shoes, they're made of plywood,' instead of "I've got chills, they're multiplying" from Grease."  --Michelle

"I used to believe that during his Peace Train song, Cat Steven's was singing 'The B-String sounding louder... higher up on the B-String.'  --Bill

" 'I've been waiting for a squirrel like you,'  Foreigner."  --Jeni

"My son thought KISS sang 'I wanna rock and roll all night and probably every day.'"  --Tami

Keep the misheard lyrics coming in the comments, and watch out for Loralee, she's trouble.

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My grandma is deaf but reads lips.  One day when I was a kid, I was sitting in her living room watching MTV. I nearly fell off the couch from laughing so hard when she asked me why Robert Palmer was singing "Bald headed baby" (roll with it baby).

Carrie, Mobile AL (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 9:14 AM)

My wife still swears to this day that E.L.O. is calling out to some guy named "Bruce" (as in "Brrrrruce") in "Don't Bring Me Down" (it's "grrrrross")!

Mark, Ridgely, TN (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 9:24 AM)

For the longest time I thought a line in Bon Jovi's song 'These Days' was "I don't own silk burning". I knew it wasn't right, but I could never figure out the lyrics. I had to look it up and when I did I found out it was really "I know Rome's still burning"

April, NYC (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 9:41 AM)

I used to think the old Four Tops song "Bernadette" chorus was "Burn her dead."

Caroline H., Fairfield County, CT (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 9:54 AM)

Until very recently, I thought Warren Zevon's
"Werewolf drinking a pina colada at Trader Vic's" hair was purple.  

Margaret Z., Jackson MS (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 9:58 AM)

My friend thought Peabo Bryson's "If Ever You're in My Arms Again" was "El Belvie You're In My arms Again."  She thought El Belvie was a woman's name.  We're still teasing her.

Becky, Bryn Mawr, PA (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 10:32 AM)

For years, I thought Metallica's "Harvester of Sorrows" was "Promiser of Sorrows" and I would sing The Rolling Stones' "Brown Sugar" as "Proud Sugar!". But, my favorite misheard lyric ever is that person who thought the beginning of Steve's Perry's "Oh Sherry" was "Cinnamon gum!" instead of "You should have been gone!"

Kristi, North Royalton, Ohio (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 10:35 AM)

thank you, havent laughed like that ina while.....'Four hundred children and this crap that won't heal.' " thats some funny shtuff..

Gus Freesene (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 10:46 AM)

Instead of "Red Skies at Night", a friend used to belt out "Ricks Got a Knife".  

amy, jackson ms (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 11:01 AM)

I always thought that the song by The Who was "cool water, cool, cool, cool, cool."

Shannon (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 12:10 PM)

My 3 year old brother.... "Transformers... bobo eats my eyes". I tried telling him it was "robots in disguse" but he wasn't buying it.

Kala H., Charlotte, NC (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 1:20 PM)

One of Sammy Hagar's songs had me going, I think it was called Heavy Metal. I'm not sure if I'm right about this, but the line "inspiration on the red line" was misunderstood by myself until a year a ago.  I thought it was something like "historation on the midnite" go figure. That does not make any sense at all.

Mr. G, Carmichael CA (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 1:34 PM)

I always thought AC/DC was singing "Dirty deeds and the Thunder Chief."

Rob, San Diego (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 1:37 PM)

I swear that in the song YEAH! by Usher he says "Those white girls best step off me" instead of "Her & my girl use to be the best of homies"....And Gwen Stefani definately says "I ain't no Harlem Black girl"

Britt, Wilmington, NC (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 2:27 PM)

I thought that "She's Come Undone" was She's come a nun".  As a 12 or 13 year old, becoming a nun was probably worse than a breakdown!

Carol B., Annapolis, MD (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 2:42 PM)

"There's a bathroom on the right"  from There's a bad moon on the rise.  CCR's Bad Moon on the Rise
"Pay for my Chrysler"  Paper back writer, Beatles

JerryinToronto (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 3:07 PM)

For many years I (and everyone else I know) thought Carly Simon sang "you had one eye in the mirror as you watched yourself go by" but she says "as you watched yourself gavotte."  Gavotte is a French peasant dance.  Not very funny, but still my favorite misheard lyric.

Lora, Boston, MA (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 3:29 PM)

"I've got a speargun, I'm going to watch TV" instead of I've got a feeling someone is watching me by Rockwell

Martha, Rochester, MI (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 3:51 PM)

When Huey Lewis sang his song "I want a new drug", my Mom always heard it as "I want a nude rug"

Lynn, Atlanta, GA (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:07 PM)

A friend at work told me how much she hated that new Sheryl Crow song with the line, "All I want to do is Hooked on Phonics."  (Instead of "All I want to do is have some fun.")  I never told her the real words, because I kind of liked hers better!

Denise, Atlanta, GA (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:09 PM)

I am the family queen of misunderstood lyrics:

"Zoot Suit Riot" by the Cherry Poppin' Daddies was "C.C. Ryan"

"Who are You, Who Who"--theme song from CSI--was "New Orleans, New New"

and my favorite, but not mine, is instead of "Its the Final Countdown", it was "Its the Fire of Downtown."

Kay, Jackson, MS (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:19 PM)

LOL... I can understand a 3 year old thinking it is " I can see all popsicles in my way" but a friend of ours always sang it that way and he was 17, (in the 70's when the song came out)!

Barbara Vallante (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:24 PM)

My cousin thought R. Kelly's song 'I dont see nothing wrong.. with a lil bump and grind' was 'I don't see nothing wrong.. treating the lil woman right'. We laughed so hard when we heard her, very seriously, singing it.    

Cilla (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:25 PM)

Blame school and 80's TV for this one:

"All I want to do is Hooked on Phonics" ("All I wanna do is have some fun")

"When the sun comes up on the Santa Monty clipboard of fun" (darn you, Bob Saget, I've yet to decipher this line)

BValek, Joliet IL (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:31 PM)

I still chuckle over my friend's mistake in Joe Walsh's "Lifes Been Good to Me".  I nearly fell over when he sang "my mama's Audi does 185" rather than "my Maserati does 185".

KB, Missouri (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:33 PM)

My husband thought Boston was singing "I see my Maryanne walking to work" instead of "walking away" in More Than A Feeling.

Donna, Kalamazoo (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 4:46 PM)

Up until about a year ago I always thought the line in  Survivor's Eye of the Tiger was 'I took my time, I did my taxes' instead of 'Did my time, took my chances'

Sara, Milwaukee WI (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 5:00 PM)

"and I don't give a hoot or a damn" rather than "I don't know who I am" from CSN&Y's version of "Woodstock"

Big Mc Birmingham AL (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 5:02 PM)

I thought Alanis Morrisette said "An old man turned and he ate" instead of "an old man turned 98.)  

C Raleigh, NC (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 5:03 PM)

Eric Claption "I'll be your bald-headed man."

Deb (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 5:13 PM)

When I was a kid and heard the Cranberries - Linger, I thought the chorus was "You know I'm searching food for you" instead of I'm such a fool for you". My mom promptly corrected me and had a good laugh about it.

Breanne, Seattle, Wash. (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 5:36 PM)

When I was younger, I thought the line "Hold me closer, tiny dancer" was "Hold me close, young Tony Danza." And I was highly amused when Phoebe on "Friends" pointed that out in an episode once. Made me happy I wasn't the only one.

Kim, Chattanooga, TN (Sent Thursday, April 09, 2009 5:41 PM)

Greatest Love of all... I thought it said " you cant take away my dinner tea" When infact it said you cant take away my dignity. hahaa

Kristen Ft. Bragg, NC (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 3:32 AM)

As a kid, thought Steve Miller sang "We go down to the lighthouse" instead of "Big old jet airliner"

KW, Grants Pass, OR (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 4:13 AM)

The one I remember most is when a kid in high school thought the lyric was "Donuts make my brown eyes blue" rather than "Don't it make my brown eyes blue" from the Crystal Gale song.   Still get a chuckle out of that one.

JP, San Francisco (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 5:01 AM)

When I was young, I thought the line in Cher's song "Half Breed" was "Wo Fat wore a gas mask since the day I was born" instead of "Both sides were against me since the day I was born".  

Kathy, Louisville, KY (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 5:59 AM)

I had a friend who used to sing the Beatles's song "Norwegian Wood" as "Isn't it good Knowing she would" and listening to the rest of the lyrics it actually makes more sense. I often wonder if they wrote it that way and changed it to make it airable.

Mike Pasternack (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 6:19 AM)

My 4-year-old (at the time) sang Enrique Eglesias' Escape chorus as, "You can run, you can die, but you can't escape my love."

Michelle, Portland, OR (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 6:23 AM)

I had always thought that it was "where was the thunder" instead of "werewolves of London"

John Fincher (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 6:35 AM)

My college roommate drove me crazy arguing that it was: "Don't fear the refer" (vs. reaper) by Blue Oyster Cult and "Come on Doobalong - he's my only brother, everybody get together and love one a another right now," by the Youngbloods.
Thank goodness the Internet can now easily confirm facts!

Sue, MN (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 7:38 AM)

I thought Michael Jackson was singing JusTINA!! Instead of Just Beat it.

Joanne, Fairhaven MA (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 7:54 AM)

For many, many years, I thought Steve Perry (Oh Sherry) was singing, Oh Sherry put your hose on (instead of our love holds on).  I really couldn't figure out why he wante her to put on panty hose...

Momma Bean (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 8:14 AM)

Chorus line to the Black Crows "Hard to Handle":

Cause I'm dealing everything in the line of chemicals and baby I'm sure hot to handle now, yes sir ma'm

Todd, Phila PA (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 8:26 AM)

One of my favorite memories is being on a long-haul car drive with my then 10 year old nephew who was singing along with the Allman Bros: "Lord I was born a Family Man!" at the top of his lungs.

Beth, Madison, WI (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 8:30 AM)

A friend of mine would get me so mad when she would sing "Teenage waitress" rather than "Teenage wasteland" from the Who's Baba O'Reiley.
I hate when people sign the wrong lyrics!

Jackie, Charleston, SC (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 8:51 AM)

Back in 1981-ish I worked at a pizza parlor and a friend of mine came in and the juke box was playing "Beast of Burden" and she looks at us and said "why did the Stones write a song about a pizza burnin"

BSG (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 8:58 AM)

How about Jimmy Buffett stepping on a "Pop Tart" in Margaritaville?

Sherry, Atlanta, GA (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 9:12 AM)

CSN's Southern Cross: I've been around the world... looking for that one-eyed girl, instead of "woman girl".

JM, Richmond VA (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 9:24 AM)

My 7-year old grandson - "I love rock and roll, put another dime in the juice box, baby."

Deb, Glen Mills, PA (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 9:26 AM)

I always sang "Spiders wear faces, you're addicted to love" by Robert Palmer, instead of "might as well face it..." I saw the video & asked my dad because it didn't make sense AND there were no spiders in the video. He still thinks that's funny.

Becky, St. Louis (Sent Friday, April 10, 2009 9:45 AM)



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